Home > Current Affairs > Loko tong Kim Jong Il na to ah

Loko tong Kim Jong Il na to ah

Mga bogus na balita na napaniwala ako nung una at napa-react ako (see title). Nanggaling ang articles sa yahoobreakingnews.com na akala kong nung una ay associated talaga sa Yahoo! Kaya pala sa CNN, mga short ranged missiles lang ang tinetesting ng North Korea.

North Korea unabashedly blows up the moon
By Author, Associated Press Writer.NORTH KOREA – The world thought that North Korea didn’t have the nuclear firepower to hit Japan let alone the moon. They were wrong.

At approximately 11:20 P.M. EST North Korea changed the world forever. Using an advanced space missile that the world has yet to even wrap their mind around, the North Koreans showed of their firepower to the world by hitting the moon.

The launch point of the missile remains unknown although an anonymous source says the government thinks it is Nampo, North Korea.

Preliminary estimates put the explosive power of the nuclear bomb at 10,000 that of the one dropped on Hiroshima.

“This has been the most powerful bomb exploded to date,” stated nuclear weapons expert Noah Cain, “and capable of destroying the entire state of Rhode Island.”

As of 11:30 PM EST the Bush Administration was not available for comment on the explosion, although Jeckma Uji, an aide to the President says the government is still waiting for a response from North Korea.

John Canterbury, a resident of Los Angeles, California, was reported saying, “I was looking at the moon through my telescope when suddenly a huge fiery cloud appeared. I ran inside to pray thinking the world was going to end.”

Experts are saying that the amount of debris and radiation that will reach earth as a result of the explosion will be minimal. However, long term effect of the explosion are yet unknown. Many scientists are saying that the bomb, regardless of its size was unable to change the moons orbit.

An anonymous scientists, however, is expressing his concerns stating, “it [the bomb] could have altered the moon’s orbit by a fraction of an inch which over the course of a couple centuries might cause the moon to crash into Earth.”

It is unknown whether North Korea has a second missile with similar capabilities and how the world will respond if it does.

Kim Jong-Il tells the world why he did it.
By Author, Associated Press Writer.

Pyongyang North Korea – Kim Jong Il said his reason for trying to destroy the moon was to show off North Korea ’s fearsome military strength.  He boasted that with his nuclear weapons and interstellar firing capability, he has the ability to destroy the world.

Kim Jong Il demanded that his country be given control over the United States and for South Korea to be firebombed.  “Great Leader” said his country’s democratic changes to the world will create a very happy world.

North Korea says it’s response to any attack on it’s soil will be to immediately respond with it’s full nuclear arsenal which they claim to have 400 more nukes of.  They did not say how many more nukes they have that can go to the moon.

The U.S. has said it will not give in to threats and demands that North Korea disarm all of it’s military completely.  If they do not obey these commands then military action will be taken against it with civilian targets not being the main target.  If all North Koreans are drafted, the white house says it has no choice but to attack anybody trying to defend the country.

Buddhists and the rest of the world are mad at North Korea ’s destruction of the moon.  NASA and other space agencies are worried more pieces or even the rest of the moon could fall out of orbit and hit Earth.  The United Nations is currently in a meeting to discuss any military or diplomatic response to this.

So far, no pieces of the moon have hit land or caused any known casualty.  Diplomats around East Asia have been reported moving far away and all flights and roads out of South Korea are full.  It is not clear if there will be any international aid given to people trying to get away from the immediate danger zones to North Korea’s nukes.

Scientists reach “Moon” claim properties for their respective countries.
By Author, Associated Press Writer. Washington DC – At 12:30AM EST – After the stunning events two weeks ago, the world awoke to even more dramatic news. Simply put, the moon has fallen onto Earth and into the Pacific Ocean.

Approximately two weeks after North Korea’s unparalleled missile hit the moon, the moon passed through the Earth’s atmosphere and landed, luckily to many, on the Pacific Ocean.

Chief NASA spokesperson, Neil Borkienmeg had this to say on this stunning revelation, “So far through our observations we can confirm that the moon, or rather a piece of it has landed on to the surface of the Pacific Ocean.”

This creates a lot of problems to the already stunned world, as the majority of the world’s fishing industry lies in the Pacific Ocean, and people expect the fish inventory to get reduced dramatically.

With the fall of the fishing industry, the rise of real estate has captured the world’s attention as nations small and big debate the size of the share of the “moon” they get.

No scientist expected this, not even one of the most radical ones at NASA, Jason Zito, who had this to say on this matter, “Never in my life would I have thought this would have happened, even after North Korea hit the moon with their missile, I guess we should be glad that the moon didn’t hit land.”

If North Korea’s goal was to shake up the world power, while creating widespread chaos, they have met their goal, but even they couldn’t imagined that the moon would be in the ocean next to them.

Bush Response to North Korea’s Moon Attack..
By Author, Associated Press Writer.

Washington DC – At 12:30AM EST President George W. Bush responded to North Korea’s missile on the moon. The speech was made from an underground bunker in an undisclosed location so as to increase the President’s protection.
The missile, which exploded on the moon, was visible to North America and parts Western Europe.

Within the speech President Bush explicitly stated, “Remain calm, these missiles pose no threat to Americans for they can not penetrate our missile defense system.”

However, an anonymous high ranking official in the military questioned President Bush’s declaration stating, “In the past 6 months our Missile Defense System has failed 3 out of 6 tests. Most of these failures were caused by a breakdown of the Superior Hydrocarbon Integrated Targeting system which is supposed to guided the missile.”

The President’s message did not come a moment too soon as fearful Americans emptied supermarkets to stock their bomb shelters and basements and supplies. Many stores across the nation ended up being looted as the panicked people tried to stock up.

“I grabbed all the canned vegetables I could and ran out of the store hoping everyone would leave me alone,” stated John Tracy, a resident of San Francisco.

Stacy Hammerback was one of the 100 people known to be trampled in the chaos.

After President Bush made his speech much of the panic subsided in all cities to a degree that could be handled by police.

During the second part of his speech President Bush threatened North Korean President Jong as he continued to state, “Kim Jong we currently have missiles twice as powerful as yours and we will not hesitate to use them if we feel threatened.”

“A cold war between North Korea and America is likely to occur as a result of the explosion,” stated leading political analysis Laksmono Rosado. The cold war would not be unlike the one between the Soviet Union and America in the post World War 2 times.

Shealin Merrick, a military strategist was quoted stating, “The only response [to North Korea] is military action to completely destroy all currently existing missiles in opposing countries.

At the moment the world has stabilized yet it is still unknown how the world will react to North Korea though some form of war is predicted.

Categories: Current Affairs Tags: , , , , , ,
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